Never Quit!

A busy week, but that's how I like!! Filled with appointments & assignments. Finished my essay & read an incredible book 😊

Daily Motivation 

Looking back there have been so many times I wanted to quit, many times I wanted to give up on everything. During those moments I couldn't see a way out or a brighter future. I've stumbled, fell flat on face, been through dark moments. Yet, I still carried on through everything. I didn't & never will quit. I stumble but I get back up & I know whatever happened yesterday no longer matter because today is another day so I'll get back on track & move closer to my dreams & goals. I know that despite everything, the good & bad, the horrible times & through my darkest days I can do it! Every time I stumble I'll get back up stronger than before! ❤

Never quit, no matter how bad it gets. You may stumble, get back up & carry on. You can do it! ❤

Past, Present & Future

Chilled Saturdays are always the best! I loved writing today & didn't realise how much I missed writing on paper since I left school. Take me back to the good times! 🙂

Daily Motivation 

I'm a reflector, always have been. Always looking back on the past, the good & bad times. Reminiscing on memories made. Never realising the impact it has on my present & possibly my future, so starting today I need to forget what's gone, leave my past where it is. Appreciate what still remains, focus on my present & live my life to the fullest! Look forward to what's coming next, I won't be afraid of my future. I'll take one step at a time & live in the now! I'm blessed, happy & grateful! ❤

You can't change your past, let it go. Live in the present & enjoy every moment! Don't worry about the future, it's not here yet ❤

Chances

Crazy last few days & yesterday ended with my macbook crashing & dying (not planning on getting it fixed again). It's time for a change....Whilst waiting for a new laptop I've been to audiobook & oddly enough falling asleep whilst listening. Hopefully that doesn't happen to me only, but to tell you the truth it has been relaxing! 

Daily Motivation 

I'm blessed to have had some wonderful opportunities, to be part of life changing experiences. Whether its personal or academic. Moving to a new country at a young age & settling into a whole new life is challenging enough, but with me those challenging kept building up. Towards the end of secondary education I was proud of everything I've achieved so far, unknown to me that it just the beginning of all the possibilities open to me! I jumped at every opportunity or experience presented to me because I knew that if I didn't then in the end I'll only regret the chances I didn't take! Every day I'm proud of all my achievements, academically & personally. I'll always jump to new opportunities or experiences! 

Grab each opportunity offered, go for that experience you want! You'll get the chances you didn't take! 

Beauty

There is nothing like friendship to make things seem bearable. I treasure my friends & their support means the world to me! 

Daily Motivation 

Perfection for me is overrated. I believe beauty is within ourselves & once you realise that, you'll feel beautiful on the outside. I have a bizarre dress sense, more than often my outfit colours don't match. I rarely wear make up. I'm seen as kid most time (even though I'm a young adult). I laugh at random times. I see myself as imperfect & I'm proud of who I am. A quirky, always smiling, happy go person who is always offering support & kindness whenever possible because for me beauty begins the moment I decided to be myself! I decided to be myself the year I started college. I realised that I don't want to hide myself from others or pretend to be someone I'm not. Since that year I've been myself. An imperfect individual who feels beautiful within herself & I hope that is shown on the outside through my kindness towards others! ❤

Beauty isn't just on the outside, but also within yourself! Find it & suddenly you'll shine on the outside. Love yourself & your imperfection! ❤

Changes

Anxiety has taken over, but I won't let it beat me. Today I did as much as I could & that is enough! 

Daily Motivation 

Change is inevitable. You can't stop it, but perhaps you can slow it down. I've faced too many changes over the years that now I've lost count. Some were big, some small. Regardless, they changed my life & from my time at college I learned that every positive change in my life begins with a clear, unequivocal decision that I'm going either do something or stop doing something. That was an eye opener during my 3rd year at college. When I decided that my health was my priority. That was when I made changes to my life such as accepting that I suffer from mental health issues like anxiety or depression. Or that asking for helping was necessary for me. There so many changes since that particular year which have been positive & needed in my life. Now as a final year undergraduate student at university I'm content & in a better place, but I still continue to face changes & I keep thinking back to those moments! ❤

Life is full of changes, you have to ensure that every positive change means you stop doing something or start ❤

Don't Underestimate Me

Monday have always been hectic for me. Although today could've been better without my anxiety taking over....I'll take a deep breathe & relax. 

Daily Motivation 

Often I seem oblivious, unaware & lost most of the time. That doesn't mean I'm completely ignorant. No, never. I may be slow when it comes to processing information or keeping up with the latest news or trends but don't underestimate me! I know more than I say, think more than I speak & notice more than you realise! 

You can be in background, that's fine. Don't let others underestimate you! 

Happiness!

End of another month. Can't believe we're nearly towards the end of 2020. Its been one interesting year & I miss going out...

Daily Motivation 

I love my life. I have great friends, an amazing family & no matter what life throws at me I keep getting up, stronger than before. There's no secret that I've been through & continue to go through tough times but I'll never put the key to my happiness in someone's pocket! I'm blessed, grateful & content with my life & wouldn't change it for anything! 

Never allow someone else to take the key to your happiness. It's yours, treasure it! 

Smile

I'm back! So sorry for the long unexpected break but I was going personal stuff. Since my last update I've been productive with my research report which is a nightmare to write because despite doing essays for a long time now, I dislike literature review. It's long & frustrating! OK, ok...Apologies for my rant, have a lot going on lately & I've come to a conclusion that lockdown is not helping my mental health...😔

Daily Motivation 

Smile! Its beautiful & brightens my day. I'm always smiling. Every day, no matter what I'm doing or how bad things are. For me there's a always a reason to smile, I just have to find it & I usually do. By doing what I love & being around those whom I love. My smile gets me through even the toughest of times & I always hold onto one reason; bad times don't last forever, better days are around the corner! I'll carry on smiling 😊❤

Smile! Spread happiness & joy. Smile even without any reason! Be happy 😊 ❤

Blessing

 

There's always a line between jokes & insults. I love joking around & teasing. But I despise insults. Ah, well...Ignoring such insults is best option! Apart from that, it's been one of the slowest days (although Sundays are always slow). One thing is for sure, I need to stop focusing on word counts for my assignments & just go with the flow! 

Daily Motivation

Life is often a roller. One minute everything is ok, the next chaos. Many times I've wanted to give up, many times I've said 'I've had enough'. Despite all the bad times, all the obstacles & struggles. I'm still thankful for everyday, every opportunity. I know that life can often throw so much at me that I find it difficult to get through it all but no matter what I'm going through, no matter how tough it gets I have trained myself to find the blessing in everything! I'm blessed to live the life that I am. I wake up everyday grateful to have another chance to do something new. I'm blessed to have a wonderful family & phenomenal friends. I'm blessed to have every opportunity I'm given to excel. I'm so so blessed in every way! 💜😊

Life can throw so much at you, you can be going through struggles. But you must find blessing in everything. Do that & you'll feel happier 

Reflection

 

Weekend's were usually filled with shopping. I miss that. I miss going out without being afraid. Gosh, I don't remember the last I felt like that...In the meantime, I made a somewhat productive start to my assignments, decided to work on two essays at once (not sure whether that's smart). As much I love my degree, choosing topics is still difficult & after 4 years I still dislike research 😂 

Daily Motivation

Whenever I'm alone, I reflect on my past a lot! More than I should actually. Which is not all bad because despite everything I've been through I do have some wonderful memories that I will cherish forever. Meeting my first best friend, completing secondary school. The craziness of 4 years at college, the awards & achievements. All those, I'll always look back on with pride. On the flip side, there are many reasons why I should stop reflecting on my past, the main one being I cannot turn back time to correct all the mistakes or erase all the trauma. Everything I've been through since I was child is a part of who I am. The good & the bad. My past has made me resilient & strong. I learned to speak out whenever I feel something isn't right & most importantly allowed myself to thrive without focusing on the bad times because when looking back didn't interest me. I knew I was doing something right. I was thriving, becoming confident & allowing myself to seen as me & not as someone who is disabled (I've been viewed as disabled for as long as I can remember). My past will always be with me, but I choose to focus on the future! 💜

Never forget your past, but stop looking back because you're not there anymore. Focus on your future! 

Never Give up!

 

End of the week & find the motivation to be productive & actually start working on my assignments...Nothing new there, although I'm surprised that I've forgotten everything since the lockdown started. Fab! Can't wait to re-view all my notes again...

Daily Motivation

Changes, challenges & struggles are part of life. They've certainly been a part of mine ever since I was a child. Growing up I was more aware of those, especially during my time at secondary school when I was target of bullying, had to deal weekly outpatient appointments & staying on top of my studies. The 5 years at secondary were definitely filled with challenges. College was full of changes, which is surprising since I did the same course for 4 years (too much repetition). Yet, towards the end of my time at college I started facing struggles which continued on throughout my time at university Those struggles were mainly trying to balance my academic life with the ongoing medical health issues as well as struggling to understand & work through my mental health problems too, All of which are ongoing, including my studies which not for the first I had to defer my assignments because of circumstances. I'm not going to pretend that I always have been strong or courageous, because that is far from the truth. I've hit rock bottom & faced times when I had realise that there's a difference between giving up & knowing when I Have had enough! Life has thrown so much at me & there were so many opportunities to give up or say 'I've had enough!' I rarely do. Why? Because, someone once said 'if you give up now. You'll regret it forever.' I'm glad I never gave up & I never will no matter what I face. I'll always be stronger than before at the end! 

Remember. Giving up & having enough has a massive difference. Don't ever give up, because once you do. You'll never get back what you lost 

Patience

Finding that determination to work on assignments since the lockdown has been difficult to say the least. Let's see how I do in the next few weeks...

Daily Motivation 

I thought my patience was tested over the last few years since my 3rd year at college. Since the time I had to deal with health challenges as well as academic life. Balancing the two has never been easy, but eventually I found a rhythm. However this year was a massive challenge in itself with the lockdown, health issues & trying to finish my degree. I may be a patient person as over the years I had learn to be patient (not easy!). But my patience continues to be tested since the beginning of this pandemic & what got me through the whole ordeal is that patience is not the ability to wait but how I act while I'm waiting! I adapted a new routine, gave myself a chance to focus on my health & explore my mental health issues further. Read from my booklist & just keep myself busy, to not dwell on the negatives. I learned to be patient, to just breathe! 

Life is chaotic, now more than ever. Remember to breathe. Take a moment for yourself & just be patient! Better days are coming 🙂

Focus on yourself

Had a fantastic day out yesterday (although it was a windy/cold weather). Met up with with my best friend & enjoyed myself! Although I learned that the more you worry about a situation the worse it'll get

Daily Motivation 

Ah yes. Comparing myself to others has always been a weakness for me & its no lie that there has been & probably always will be times when I'm jealous of others around me. More than often I envy them for having a simple & joyful life (although that isn't always true). I'm jealous of what they're doing such as working or traveling without having to worry about so much! Gradually I opened my eyes & realised that I may not be on the same level as everyone; someone who has a job or goes on holiday every other year or so but I should be grateful for everything I DO have! Focus on myself because it matters what I'm doing not anyone else! 

Don't be jealous of other around you, you may not realise that they are wishing to be in your place. Not everyone is perfect