Happiness!

End of another month. Can't believe we're nearly towards the end of 2020. Its been one interesting year & I miss going out...

Daily Motivation 

I love my life. I have great friends, an amazing family & no matter what life throws at me I keep getting up, stronger than before. There's no secret that I've been through & continue to go through tough times but I'll never put the key to my happiness in someone's pocket! I'm blessed, grateful & content with my life & wouldn't change it for anything! 

Never allow someone else to take the key to your happiness. It's yours, treasure it! 

Smile

I'm back! So sorry for the long unexpected break but I was going personal stuff. Since my last update I've been productive with my research report which is a nightmare to write because despite doing essays for a long time now, I dislike literature review. It's long & frustrating! OK, ok...Apologies for my rant, have a lot going on lately & I've come to a conclusion that lockdown is not helping my mental health...😔

Daily Motivation 

Smile! Its beautiful & brightens my day. I'm always smiling. Every day, no matter what I'm doing or how bad things are. For me there's a always a reason to smile, I just have to find it & I usually do. By doing what I love & being around those whom I love. My smile gets me through even the toughest of times & I always hold onto one reason; bad times don't last forever, better days are around the corner! I'll carry on smiling 😊❤

Smile! Spread happiness & joy. Smile even without any reason! Be happy 😊 ❤

Blessing

 

There's always a line between jokes & insults. I love joking around & teasing. But I despise insults. Ah, well...Ignoring such insults is best option! Apart from that, it's been one of the slowest days (although Sundays are always slow). One thing is for sure, I need to stop focusing on word counts for my assignments & just go with the flow! 

Daily Motivation

Life is often a roller. One minute everything is ok, the next chaos. Many times I've wanted to give up, many times I've said 'I've had enough'. Despite all the bad times, all the obstacles & struggles. I'm still thankful for everyday, every opportunity. I know that life can often throw so much at me that I find it difficult to get through it all but no matter what I'm going through, no matter how tough it gets I have trained myself to find the blessing in everything! I'm blessed to live the life that I am. I wake up everyday grateful to have another chance to do something new. I'm blessed to have a wonderful family & phenomenal friends. I'm blessed to have every opportunity I'm given to excel. I'm so so blessed in every way! 💜😊

Life can throw so much at you, you can be going through struggles. But you must find blessing in everything. Do that & you'll feel happier 

Reflection

 

Weekend's were usually filled with shopping. I miss that. I miss going out without being afraid. Gosh, I don't remember the last I felt like that...In the meantime, I made a somewhat productive start to my assignments, decided to work on two essays at once (not sure whether that's smart). As much I love my degree, choosing topics is still difficult & after 4 years I still dislike research 😂 

Daily Motivation

Whenever I'm alone, I reflect on my past a lot! More than I should actually. Which is not all bad because despite everything I've been through I do have some wonderful memories that I will cherish forever. Meeting my first best friend, completing secondary school. The craziness of 4 years at college, the awards & achievements. All those, I'll always look back on with pride. On the flip side, there are many reasons why I should stop reflecting on my past, the main one being I cannot turn back time to correct all the mistakes or erase all the trauma. Everything I've been through since I was child is a part of who I am. The good & the bad. My past has made me resilient & strong. I learned to speak out whenever I feel something isn't right & most importantly allowed myself to thrive without focusing on the bad times because when looking back didn't interest me. I knew I was doing something right. I was thriving, becoming confident & allowing myself to seen as me & not as someone who is disabled (I've been viewed as disabled for as long as I can remember). My past will always be with me, but I choose to focus on the future! 💜

Never forget your past, but stop looking back because you're not there anymore. Focus on your future! 

Never Give up!

 

End of the week & find the motivation to be productive & actually start working on my assignments...Nothing new there, although I'm surprised that I've forgotten everything since the lockdown started. Fab! Can't wait to re-view all my notes again...

Daily Motivation

Changes, challenges & struggles are part of life. They've certainly been a part of mine ever since I was a child. Growing up I was more aware of those, especially during my time at secondary school when I was target of bullying, had to deal weekly outpatient appointments & staying on top of my studies. The 5 years at secondary were definitely filled with challenges. College was full of changes, which is surprising since I did the same course for 4 years (too much repetition). Yet, towards the end of my time at college I started facing struggles which continued on throughout my time at university Those struggles were mainly trying to balance my academic life with the ongoing medical health issues as well as struggling to understand & work through my mental health problems too, All of which are ongoing, including my studies which not for the first I had to defer my assignments because of circumstances. I'm not going to pretend that I always have been strong or courageous, because that is far from the truth. I've hit rock bottom & faced times when I had realise that there's a difference between giving up & knowing when I Have had enough! Life has thrown so much at me & there were so many opportunities to give up or say 'I've had enough!' I rarely do. Why? Because, someone once said 'if you give up now. You'll regret it forever.' I'm glad I never gave up & I never will no matter what I face. I'll always be stronger than before at the end! 

Remember. Giving up & having enough has a massive difference. Don't ever give up, because once you do. You'll never get back what you lost 

Patience

Finding that determination to work on assignments since the lockdown has been difficult to say the least. Let's see how I do in the next few weeks...

Daily Motivation 

I thought my patience was tested over the last few years since my 3rd year at college. Since the time I had to deal with health challenges as well as academic life. Balancing the two has never been easy, but eventually I found a rhythm. However this year was a massive challenge in itself with the lockdown, health issues & trying to finish my degree. I may be a patient person as over the years I had learn to be patient (not easy!). But my patience continues to be tested since the beginning of this pandemic & what got me through the whole ordeal is that patience is not the ability to wait but how I act while I'm waiting! I adapted a new routine, gave myself a chance to focus on my health & explore my mental health issues further. Read from my booklist & just keep myself busy, to not dwell on the negatives. I learned to be patient, to just breathe! 

Life is chaotic, now more than ever. Remember to breathe. Take a moment for yourself & just be patient! Better days are coming 🙂

Focus on yourself

Had a fantastic day out yesterday (although it was a windy/cold weather). Met up with with my best friend & enjoyed myself! Although I learned that the more you worry about a situation the worse it'll get

Daily Motivation 

Ah yes. Comparing myself to others has always been a weakness for me & its no lie that there has been & probably always will be times when I'm jealous of others around me. More than often I envy them for having a simple & joyful life (although that isn't always true). I'm jealous of what they're doing such as working or traveling without having to worry about so much! Gradually I opened my eyes & realised that I may not be on the same level as everyone; someone who has a job or goes on holiday every other year or so but I should be grateful for everything I DO have! Focus on myself because it matters what I'm doing not anyone else! 

Don't be jealous of other around you, you may not realise that they are wishing to be in your place. Not everyone is perfect 

Appreciation

Messed up sleeping pattern, rainy weather & lazy days. Yep, all in all my weekend has not been productive at. Need to work on that. I have started reading a new book which is intriguing 

Daily Motivation

Helping others is second nature to me. My life is more or less a rollercoaster, not a day goes by without facing some kind of challenge.Yet, that has never & will never stop me from helping others. Whether it's my family, friends or strangers. I'll always go the extra mile to help them because when I feel appreciated I will always do more than what is expected & because I want to change someone's life. Even if it's making someone smile or listening to them helps.Than I will because knowing I made a difference is more than enough for me! 

Never fail to lend a helping hand, you never know the difference you're making in someone else's life

Grief

Spent the day out today. It was nerve racking since I had gone out after a long time. I was anxious & worried. Thankfully I had my music to help me. Its a good source of distraction 

Daily Motivation 

I have lost people. Some whom I knew & some who I didnt't. Nonetheless the feeling is the same, maybe a tad different for those people I was close to. But do you know what, I don't think grief should have a time limit. The people who think there's a limit time for grief, have never lost a piece of their heart. Take all the time you need! 

Grief doesn't have a time limit & it never should!